Books, Attachment & Letting Go

"Once you stop clinging and let things be, you’ll be free, even of birth and death. You’ll transform everything."~Bodhidharma (c. 440 AD - 528 AD)

As I was sitting in my attic/office/meditation room this morning it occurred to me once again how many "things" I have collected over the course of the last thirty years (yes, since I was ten!).

Books, VHS tapes, DVDs, video games, comic books, board games.

Nearly all of these have been for my personal use and pleasure and I recognize that the initial purchase of them in the first place was largely a form of selfishness and bread of the desire for attachment to "things." As I sat looking at the collections of "stuff", some of which are still being added to, it struck me that I should divest myself of them in a move to lessen my attachment. I also realize that though this is something of an "all-or-nothing" proposal (you really can't be "half-right" can you?), I am not ready to do so, and that perhaps baby steps would be the easiest move. You know, the whole "every journey of a thousand miles..." deal.

This week, I decide, I would focus on my books which are the most difficult to reduce as they are the easiest to convince myself of their value: "I might need them in the future for some never-to-be-started project," "maybe my kids/students would have need for them at some point," "don't make me 'look' smart, all hidden away up my attic?"

I have tried nearly every year since we moved into this house seven years ago to whittle down the collection of books (novels, texts, poetry, biographies, etceteras) that I have brought with me from house-to-apartment-to-house, but always have a difficult time letting go of them. It is not necessarily that I have even read the books in as many of 20 years (or even, really, at from cover to cover), but rather that when I hold the book and leaf through its pages I am often reminded of something (a moment, a period of my life, a person) and find it hard to simply put it in the "donation pile."

This week, following our return from the race in Hector, NY, I will once again (this time for sure) develop a few different piles of books. Those which are appropriate (ie. have no swearing, sex or whatever), I will attempt to donate to the local school library. What remains, I will find some other place to donate to. I will, however, be keeping a select number of them, as I am not yet ready to go "cold turkey" on attachment--a serious lack of discipline I apologize for... it is hard to let go.